a personal style blog by Lauren Pfieffer

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Be Yourself: It's the Best Imitation You Can Do.

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Silk Blouse, Denim Skirt, Necklace: Thrifted.
Floral Mary Janes: Forever21.

I haven't always been proud of who I am. There's been many points in my life where I would look at myself in the mirror, staring intently at myself. I wasn't looking at my face. I wasn't looking at my body. I wasn't looking at my hair or clothing either. I was looking at my soul.

At points in my life I had trouble accepting the way I act, think, talk, and live my life. From a very young age I felt as though I was different than most. I had this peculiar problem with connecting with people. I would talk to them and play just like all of the other kids, but I was always left feeling empty. More so than empty though, I always felt this feeling of...betrayal. Like I had betrayed myself because I acted how other people wanted me to act, and I didn't act how I knew I should. I didn't act the way I knew in my heart that was me.

Over the years, acceptance of who I am has been the largest struggle I've come across. I think that as a young preteen I was always looking for a role model or someone to emulate. Someone like me. Through trial and error I feel like it helped me discover myself. Obviously trying to crack jokes every moment didn't work out for me. Acting like a tough girl wasn't my strong suit. Trying to fit in with the naturally smart and well gifted wasn't quite my right placement either...

Eventually, I did find Lauren. I found the quiet, quirky, awkward, loving, sensitive, sentimental, and old-fashion Lauren. The funny thing though was that she was there inside me all along and I was too blind to see it. Through all the fake smiles and the forced conversations, she was there. Through all of the coming home crying and feeling alone she was there. Through all of the trying to be anyone but myself, Lauren was always there.

Moral of the story? Simply always be yourself. Don't try and be her, or him, or me, or anyone. Just be yourself. It's the best imitation you can do.

"To be nobody but yourself in a world that's doing its best to make you somebody else, is to fight the hardest battle you are ever going to fight. Never stop fighting." -E.E. Cummings.

With much love, Lauren
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26 comments

Eva said...

I love the shoes! great look!!
www.evasblackbuttons.blogspot.com

leah jean said...

You are amazing and beautiful! This post kind of echoes the thoughts I've been having lately...it seems like once you accept yourself for who you are, then other people are more willing to accept you as well. :)

leah jean said...

Oh...annnnnnd...check out my latest blog post because it contains some sad news that I want everyone to see!

life in a nutshell

April said...

Amen.

Love those shoes so much. Are they comfortable??

Laura said...

I LOVE those shoes! It's great that you know who you are and only want to be yourself :)

Laura
whitewinters.blogspot.com

Mackenzie said...

Lovely post and great advice. I can really relate to your story about trying to find someone to be a role model. Through wishing we could be someone else, we lose sight of ourselves. Great post!

Mackenzie
Reasons to Celebrate

Unknown said...

Such a nicely written post. And I totally agree that it's best to be yourself. You'll ultimately be happy, more comfortable, and maintain better relationships. I think the older you get the easier it is to be happy in your own skin.

Also, really pretty outfit. I adore those shoes. I would've loved a pair! However I didn't see them as practical for walking to class. So sad.

Chicca said...

Great post honey and thanks for the advice, we must be ourselves!!!
PS can't take my eyes off your shoes ;)!
http://chiccastyle.blogspot.com/

Anonymous said...

Very true...it's always great when you realise something like that!

also...love those shoes...they are amazing!!

Unknown said...

What a good post! Very true dear, it's al about finding yourself and helping others to find themselves, too. xxx

The Semi Sweet said...

As you grow up it becomes much easier to find yourself. Other people start to realize the same thing as they grow older and it just makes it easier for everyone. Individuality just become more accepting.

Rebecca said...

oh, this is such a wonderful message! seriously, you have to accept who you are, because in all honesty you're never going to be anyone else (and on a slightly more superficial note, i really, really do love your shoes)

http://itscohen.blogspot.com/

Fashion Addict said...

This is a really beautiful post and I'm glad you were able to go through this experience and learn something so powerful like this. :) And I love your outfit btw.

Mary said...

This is SUCH the truth-- and such an important thing to discover. I'm so happy for you that you've not only found who you are but you are embracing it as well!

And on a less serious note: I a-DORE those shoes! Gorgeous :)

Mary said...

This is SUCH the truth-- and such an important thing to discover. I'm so happy for you that you've not only found who you are but you are embracing it as well!

And on a less serious note: I a-DORE those shoes! Gorgeous :)

The Mad Twins said...

Such a sweet outfit! I totally adore your shoes!

OrigamiGirl said...

Epic shoes! I am impressed as I can never walk in heels like that.
I think a lot of people spend too much time trying to be what people expect them to be, even if it's not to be 'cool' people fall into holes in friendship groups, like feeling the need to be 'the funny one'. It's a wonderful thing to be able to be fully yourself. :)

Midwest Muse said...

Those shoes! I love this post. I'm so glad you're so open and discovering who you are. It's a beautiful thing.

Rowan | R E D R E I D I N G H O O D said...

Love this outfit! The color of your blouse is fantastic!

Thank you for your lovely comment, dear!

Loves,
Rowan

www.redreidinghood.blogspot.com

jess said...

You should always be yourself. I love the shoes!

Julia Topaz said...

you are so freaking adorable.

Lucy Lu said...

loveeeely shoes :) and you have so cute face!

have a nice day,
Lucy,

Natalie said...

i love the shoes!!!


www.therougelipstickdiaries.blogspot.com

Kelsey Cole said...

thank you so much for your sweet comment, it was so sincere and it totally made my day!
This was a beautiful post. I have felt the same way at times.. I get discouraged when I compare myself to others and try to conform to what I think people want me to be. And over the years I have found that doing that only makes me unhappy. I am purely happy when I am true to my own self and personality. And being true to yourself brings so much contentment and confidence:)
You are beautiful and i can't wait to read more from your blog!

p.s. and yes, me and my husband were high school sweethearts:)

Katie Burry said...

This outfit is so adorable! I love your shoes! <3

I can really relate to this post. I had a close friend all through growing up, but she lived far away, and I still felt lonely. More than anything I wanted a friend, and I worried lots about what people would think about me. After I met my best friend, my confidence grew a lot, and I actually started to experiment - to see what I liked. I've gone through lots of phases ("punk", vintage, authoress, etc.) but for the first time in my life I feel like I'm really being myself. And then, low and behold! I found that there are other people like me! That's what I love about blogging - I don't feel like such a weirdo anymore. :D

Anyway, great post! Thanks so much for sharing this!

And thanks for your sweet comment on my cage post. I love getting comments from you. <3

Sydney said...

I couldn't agree with you more! What a beautiful post and adorable outfit! I've felt the same way about myself at times. It's definitely a continuous journey of self discovery and it's nice to read that others are so open about what they're going through as well. It's definitely encouraging.

Best,
Sydney

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