You Took This Heart and Set It Free.
SomeoneLikeYou Wednesday, June 22, 2011
1960's dress, Bow, Tan Heels, White Bangles: All Thrifted.
This is an excerpt from my personal Tumblr page from a few days ago:
"Tonight I feel oddly strange. Inspired but yet not. Insecure yet confident. I can’t quite describe this feeling. It’s one of absolute brilliance, yet absolute madness. All I want to do is create. To create outfits. To create art. To create writing. Yet although I have this want to create, I feel like I’m sub par. As though I’m not good enough to do any of those things. I feel down upon myself because I am an average girl with average talents. I hold nothing exceptional but the art of being Lauren Pfieffer. I guess that will just have to do for now."
Sometimes I just get like this and I can't particularly describe or pinpoint this feeling all that well. The feeling of wanting to be brilliant and what you always dream of, but yet feeling like you lack the talent to do so. I've always had trouble believing in myself. I suppose it's just my nature. I compare to much. I compare my looks, my life, my blog, my school work, my very existence to everyone else. It's not healthy and it's not right, but as humans it's what we do. We strive to be better and be the person we want. We picture what we want to be in our minds, and work like crazy to achieve that almost intangible dream. But when we falter in our path, we become discouraged and begin to doubt ourselves. We begin to compare and rip ourselves apart and wish we could be that person or be that thing that we idolize. Well, I'm tired of wishing I was better and I'm tired of doubting myself. I'm tired of being unsatisfied with myself and my abilities. I want to come to an acceptance of what I can do, and not what I can't do. I don't know if I can do this, but I sure as heck can try.
With much love, Lauren.