Every year for my birthday I love to do a "Lauren through the years" post to see how far I've come in my life time... To not only see the changes in my life, but to reflect on them, as well. My life of now eighteen years today. It's so funny when looking back at old pictures of myself. They bring back so many memories: many good, many bad. The pictures bring back insecurities, heartbreak, self-destruction, inner struggles... Along with all that they bring back triumphs, victories, confidence, growing, self-acceptance, and finding myself.
If I had to look at my life and say if I am proud of who I've become, I would have to say...yes. I've had struggles of self acceptance, inner and outer in the past. There have been times in my life where I never thought I would reach a true pinnacle of happiness with myself. I never thought that I would be able to look in the mirror and tell myself, "Lauren, you are worth something. You are beautiful and intelligent, witty and sensitive, emotional and caring, and most of all... there's not another someone like you in this entire world..."
I cry as I type these words right now because turning eighteen is so much more than a number to me. It's more than the fact that I can vote or buy cigarettes, be considered an actual adult or open my own banking account... It's about looking back at my life and being satisfied. With who I'm been, who I am, and who I will become. Nothing can ever replace any of that.
With much love, Lauren.