My Bathing Suit Journey.

29 comments
1960's Bathing Suit, White Flats: Thrifted.

I was thirteen before I wore my first two piece bathing suit. I had been overweight my whole life with a rather large stomach area so bikini's were out of the question. A frequent fish at the local swimming pool, I was fascinated by these older girls who wore two piece suits. Their tan and toned stomachs glittering with crystals as they gracefully lifted their bodies out of the pool. Jealously always overcame me.

For some reason when I was thirteen though I began to loose all of my 'baby fat' or whatever you might call it. My mom decided it was time to go out and get me a big girl suit instead of the sporty team ones I had been wearing for years. I'll always remember that first two piece. It was from Value City by Liz Claiborne. It was more of a tankini but still showed a peek of my stomach at the bottom. It was white with brilliant rainbow lines of color, a string tying up around my neck. A little fabric flower adorned the top. I wore that suit with such pride and until it was so worn out you could see my behind. I saved it as a momentum for the longest time until my mother persuaded me to give up my pack rat ways and pitch it.

I went through a lot of bikini's over the years. Deep purples, polka dots, florals, retro inspired, skimpy, revealing, and bandeau type. I was fearless in my two piece. It was my weapon of choice in the summer.

After I stopped swim team and got a bit older, I definitely noted changes in my body type. My hips got wider, my stomach rounder, my butt bigger. Unfortunately I never got the chest part that comes with all of these changes (I blame genetics). I saw myself changing and tried to stop it. Exercising, cutting back on food. I wanted so badly to wear that stupid bikini with confidence like I used to be able to do. I didn't use to feel embarrassed walking by people in it at the pool. Why did I now? I didn't use to feel embarrassed about posting vacation pictures of me in it on facebook. Why did I now? I didn't use to lay on the chair the whole time, stretching out my stomach and sucking it in. Why did I now?

I still feel like sometimes I can't anwser these questions. I wish I could say that I feel 100% confident in my bikini to this day but I can't. I'm still working on these insecurities one day at a time. One thing I have noticed though is how I've come full circle from my childhood. I started with a one piece, and I'm back to that one piece. One pieces shouldn't be feared. They don't mean you're fat, they don't mean you're insecure. They mean, hey look at me. I'm sexy and I look good- just as good as I would in that silly two piece. Just because you're more covered up doesn't mean that you're not as beautiful.

No one can help you beat your body insecurities but yourself. It takes finding the inner you and embracing it no matter what your body type is. I know you all can do it. You all are the most beautiful, brave, courageous girls I've ever met. I've received many emails, comments, and messages from you all about your body insecurities and worries. My tip? Have no worries. Be yourself, embrace your body, and don't ever look back. I have faith in you, it's time you have faith in yourself.

With much love, Lauren.

P.S. And further proof that I'm not perfect, this is what a good 50% of my photos looked like. Good thing they didn't name me Grace ;)

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29 lovely little notes:

H. said...

I love this bathing suit!

Jamie Rose said...

Haha oh man that outtake picture is adorable! You look so cute in your vintage swimsuit. You definitely rock a one piece! I've been admiring the many cute one piece swimsuits that have been coming out lately. I don't go to the pool much though so I haven't bothered to buy one. They don't fit me too well anyway because I'm so short waisted. Sad.
Anyway, you look great in these pictures and this swimsuit is much more original and fun than a string bikini! You look fantastic!

Mary said...

You are ALWAYS gorgeous, lady, but you are so extra beautiful when you smile! I LOVE that out-take! :)

Laura said...

This is such an adorable suit! I absolutely love it and you look fantastic in it. You work it girl, you are so lovely. And I LOVE that outtake photo! So fun and cute. :)

xoxo,
Laura
http://lauraisthriftingthroughlife.blogspot.com/

Amanda said...

You're so lucky that you can wear a one-piece swimsuit. All my life I've been too long in the torso to ever find one that properly fits me. Not that I don't mind wearing a two-piece, I'd just like to change it up once in a while but I'm too tall!

xo. Amanda of Lovely, Charming, Delightful

Teddi said...

lauren, what a well written, & sincere post! :) you are a wise woman. grace? i'm not laughing at you. i'm sharing that i bruise myself with my clumsiness, nearly daily.

Meredith Elyse said...

I love your bathing suit! I'm a one piece wearer too and it's so nice to see other girls doing the same and breaking the mold. :)

http://scatterbrainedstylings.blogspot.com

Meredith Elyse said...

I love your bathing suit! I'm a one piece wearer too and it's so nice to see other girls doing the same and breaking the mold. :)

http://scatterbrainedstylings.blogspot.com

Meredith Elyse said...

I love your bathing suit! I'm a one piece wearer too and it's so nice to see other girls doing the same and breaking the mold. :)

http://scatterbrainedstylings.blogspot.com

Britney said...

Oh Lauren! You are amazing!! I love this post. Its so well written and beautiful! Also I love the vintage bathing suit. I've not been swimming for years because, in all honest I have wearing bathing suits!! The retro one pieces have always looked beautiful to me though!! As always you are very inspiring and very sweet!!
And the last photo is adorable!!
-Britney of Lemonwood and Honey :D

Angel said...

A very lovely post. Thank you for sharing. I can relate. The swimsuit is cute btw. :]

Marcia said...

gahh.. you are beautiful! and love love love the last one!

Isabella said...

Lauren, you look so amazing in this one piece. Thanks for sharing your bathing suit story- I've always had trouble finding the right swimsuit shape too. And I love the out-take- about 80% of my outfit pictures turn out like that! xo
http://viewsofnow.com/

Kezzie said...

My favourite shot is the one where you nearly fall in! I'd love a swimsuit like that one- I hate high cut ones, I'd really like one like that! You look beautiful and I wish I had somewhere like that to swim in!

CarleeJ said...

Love all the photos the last one is so cute! Also love your story. I am looking for a good one piece. I still wear my bikini all the time but have been seeing some really awesome one pieces and want to try one out.
Carlee

http://almostendearing.blogspot.com/

Claire said...

stop it, you are too pretty! and the last photo is hilarious/perfect! also you look so confident in these photos, I have absolutely no confidence in a swimsuit, i avoid the pool, i don't even like wearing one pieces, i just wish i had the confidence. xx

Claire said...

stop it, you are too pretty! and the last photo is hilarious/perfect! also you look so confident in these photos, I have absolutely no confidence in a swimsuit, i avoid the pool, i don't even like wearing one pieces, i just wish i had the confidence. xx

Sleepsongs and Shadowlands said...

Aw, you look gorgeous (and the last photo was my favorite). Recently I went to a swimming party and wore my swimsuit in front of all the 'pretty girls' and was confident because I kept thinking 'Lauren would want me to be confident'. And it helped that some of the 'cute guys' flirted with me, too. :)

Grace Doolittle said...

I understand insecurity: I have an eating disorder. Something in me connects my extreme desire to be loved and accepted and my need for self-perfecting directly to body image. And in my mind I am never good enough.
But I know that I am so much more. And so are you. "Girth is not the measure of worth." God uses a much different scale to measure things.
You are lovely, by the way. You probably hear that a lot, but I just thought I should remind you.
:)

Charmaine said...

You look like an Old Hollywood movie star! So pretty!

Beautifully Pure said...

I have and never will understand why one piece bathing suits are something to be feared. *shakes head* I've never had a bikini before and I never will. I'm more comfortable in my one piece than I ever could be in a bikini.

Showing more skin doesn't mean your sexier, and it doesn't mean your more confident.

Maria said...

YOU ARE SUCH A BABE! I love this post Lauren. Not only is it completely beautiful, but you are an inspiration to all girls out there. I just love this post.. and that photo at the end is so hilarious! You are so adorable, reminds me so much of the bloopers that come out of my outfit pictures, hehe :)
xx aria

Jess said...

Such a cute bathing suit! I tried wearing a bikini last summer, and I just felt overexposed, like I was trying to look sexy (in a, you know, bad way). I felt uncomfortable every time I wore it, especially in front of my guy friends. This year, I found an adorable retro-inspired one-piece that makes me look good and feel confident, and I have regained my love of the pool :) Stay unique and wonderful, Lauren! Don't ever let anyone else change your AMAAAAZING style! (Not that you'd let them, hehe.)

Lucie said...

Beautiful summer photos! You look so beautiful!))
Kisses

Katie Q. said...

Haha! I always love seeing out-take photos and that last one of you is quite adorable! ^_^ you have some really fantastic photos dear, I love your retro makeup, you like just like a pin up girl. Pretty much all of us have things about bathing suits that we hate, but I do love how brave you always appear in your swimsuit photos, and I really love that last photo, you look like you're having so much fun!

Hannah said...

Wow you are so super stunning you have no reason to doubt how beautiful you are...you're perfect in every way!

dimplesdiaries
x

Miranda said...

This swim suit is GORGEOUS! It's so cute, retro, and fits you perfectly. I'm jealous haha :)

awishisarainbow said...

I love this swimsuit! I too prefer a one piece, not because I don't want to show off my stomach (I wear skimpier costumes for bellydancing after all!). I prefer it because it's more comfy for swimming, and as you say, it shows confidence :) You look lovely, and I love that last photo!

kold_kadavr_ flatliner said...

I'd loooove to see you
in the Great Beyond
to kiss thy feets...
yet, how can I if you dont yet
know the Way home?
Take my hand, dear...

Google+: kold_kadavr _flatliner

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