Navy Poncho, Brown Wedges: Thrifted.
White Dress: Delia's.
Pearl Necklace: Forever21.
Ring: Gift from reader Kezzie.
It's been a rough day. It started when I woke up at seven this morning and it hasn't stopped since.
I give so much to people. I give them my heart right from the beginning and trust so easily. I make people my everything because all I want in return is even the tiniest bit of love and care back. At the end of the day, every single time though I get crapped on.
People in my real life just don't get it. I'm always being disappointed, let down, taken advantage of, and it never ends. I don't know if I just have "ready to be taken advantage of and let down" written on my forehead or what, but that seems like the only thing people in my life do anymore.
I thought it would all go away when I left high school. People would change, they would grow up, they would care. It hasn't been the case though; things haven't changed in that aspect. I just for once want to be appreciated and loved and respected like all that I give...and right now I haven't a lot of hope I'll ever find that.
I used to be able to deal with being used and abused because I had one person who would never do that to me. I had a person I never thought would. Turns out that was all a lie and I can't even rely on him. The one person I always could.
So, I'm at a weird place now of where I'm tired of being hurt. Tired of getting crapped on and everything that comes along with it. I'm so.tired.of.it. Like every situation in my life, it seems like I can't do anything to control or make things better. It's all in the hands of other people. And that stinks. A lot.
But things will get better. Someday.
With much love, Lauren.
P.S. These pictures were taken at a local park in Kent this weekend when I went with my friend Erin. It was the most beautiful place I've ever been to. I felt infinite there.
