Dear high school readers,
Just half a year ago I was in high school, too. The four years I spent in high school were miserable. I felt suffocated by the person my classmates expected me to be. So afraid to express myself creatively, show a personal side to myself that no one saw. Isolation was so prevalent. I can count the number of friends I had on one hand and really only hung out with one of them outside of school. I felt out of place, outcasted, and judged on a daily basis. I never thought that things would get better. Actually, I knew they wouldn't. For supposedly being the 'best years of my life,' high school was one experience where I thought is there really any point in going through life if this is as good as it gets?
I know you. I know how you feel. I know that desperation and that feeling of wanting to get out. Of wanting to be yourself and reach your dreams and finding people who are exactly like you. I know the feeling of never thinking it's going to get better; that you'll be stuck in this awful hole of misery for the rest of your life. I know how it feels to think that no one understands you. That no one can help you. That you're all alone in this struggle of finding an inner and outer happiness.
But I just wanted to tell you. It gets better. I know it's hard to believe, hard to grasp but it really does. Coming from the one girl who really and truly never thought that things would get better. You have an incredible life waiting for you outside the confinements of high school. People you never thought existed. Who are genuine and real and don't care that you're a little weird. There's freedom to wear what you want and be who you are and say how you feel. The world is so big, bigger than you can ever imagine and realize but when you're in high school...it seems like that's all there is. Those awful hallways that seem never ending. There's cozy coffee shops and majestic forests and big cities and the most perfect place you can imagine.
Hang in there. Please. I didn't believe anyone when they told me that college would be the most incredible experience of my life but I wish had. Because they're so, so right. You have so much waiting for you. Don't give up, don't lose hope.
It gets better.
With much love, Lauren.